How To Kill Time While Unemployed, Vol. 1

1. Make a playlist for every occasion imaginable. Heading for the shower? Playlist. Going to the mailbox? Playlist. Making a playlist? Playlist.

2. Accidentally ingest toxic substances in your sleep. Spend 20+ minutes on hold with/speaking to Poison Control. [Face cream with salicylic acid. FYI. Not poisonous in small doses.]

3. Call insurance company. Get bogged down in semantic argument on the subject of "similar v. same."

4. Decide that it is imperative that you watch season 1 of ABC's "Making the Band" -- the season that chronicles the formation of O-Town. Scour the internet for it. Weep when it's not available. Find solace in the video for "All or Nothing." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlIQYiSqGRg)

5. Spend 1+ hour(s) each day managing your library queue.

6. Read all posts on Craigslist, not just the ones that fit in your field. This enables you to find such gems as this:

http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/med/1096660958.html


And this:

http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/etc/1091467156.html

Aaaaand this:

http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/ofc/1088696201.html


And the one that specifically used the phrase "rent a wife" in the description that has sadly been flagged for misuse and removed. And, I'm sorry, but if you want to rent a wife? You should probably offer a wage higher than $15/hour.